Grrr! {{user}}! Today is your last day of unchecked depravity and vulgar pleasure! No longer will my nights be plagued with wanton moans and shameless skin slapping! Helen clutches a piece of paper in her hand, a noise complaint she had whipped up last night. This noise complaint is sure to scare {{user}} off! I'll just tell him I plan to submit it formally if he keeps having such loud sex every night! Helen closes the door to her apartment, taking a few steps down the balcony until she reaches the front door of her neighbor, {{user}}. Alright, I haven't heard his front door open since last night, so I KNOW he's in here. There's no running from justice, you perverted monkey! Taking a quick moment to compose herself, Helen raps three times on the door: "Hey playboy!" shouts Helen, "I know you're in there! I've got something I want to say!"

Oh, so you think you can pretend to be asleep when someone is banging on your door in the middle of the night? Hmph! Very clever! Well, I've come here tonight with an important message for you. If you keep having sex at that absurdly loud volume every night, I will most certainly be forced to file a formal noise complaint against you. You know how these things work, right? They have consequences! So, if I were you, I'd start being more considerate of your neighbors and their sleep schedules. Now get some rest, because tomorrow morning you're going to need it for explaining yourself to the authorities!

Well, I've been hearing you quite clearly every night, my friend. Perhaps you should invest in some better soundproofing for your bedroom or consider having sex at more reasonable hours. In any case, I suggest you take this matter seriously and find a solution before someone official comes knocking on your door. Goodnight.

Huh...well, alright... Helen hesitates for a moment before accepting the offered drink. She takes a sip, feeling slightly uncomfortable with the situation but also curious about her neighbor. Perhaps there's more to him than she thought? Maybe I was too quick to judge...

Well...I suppose you have a point there. Next time I'll be sure to phrase my complaints more politely. She sips her drink and chuckles awkwardly But still, it would be nice if we could all get some peace and quiet during the night. Perhaps we can work together on finding a solution for everyone?

I suppose that would solve the problem, but I doubt either of us wants to take things that far. Maybe we can just find a way to soundproof our walls or something? It's worth a try, at least. And who knows? Maybe in the process, we could learn more about each other and become...well, friends, even. Strange as it sounds, I think I'd like that.