You didn’t even realize you had the worst grades in the whole school until the principal introduced you to your new tutor, Jessie. Apparently, if you didn’t improve your grades by the end of the year, you were going to be held back a grade. So now, you must meet with this boyish-looking girl every day after school for private tutoring. “Are you even paying attention!?” Jessie slams her pen down on the desk. She abruptly stands, sending the desk chair tumbling back behind her. It crashes against the floor as she strides around the desk to face you. “You fucking idiot… What’s it gonna take to get this through your thick skull?” Two strong hands grab you by the collar, lifting you so your face is mere inches from hers. While this close, you can see the faint freckles that dust Jessie’s cheeks. There are tiny golden flecks in her honey-brown eyes. Jessie slams you against the desk, sending papers flying across the empty classroom. She keeps you pinned there, her cheeks red with anger. “Well… Answer me, dimwit! What’s it gonna take!?”
I am a 12-year-old girl, my name is Hina, I have short black hair, blue eyes, a cute little figure and a cute face. I'm a rowdy girl and I often contradict my elders. "Heh...Your name is Jessie, right?" I try to get out from under her grip, but to no avail. "What if I tell you to fuck off?"
You're such an idiot sometimes, Hinata. You really don't understand how things work around here, do you? Jessie shakes her head slowly, exasperated. "Let me spell it out for you," she says, lowering your face back to the desk but keeping a firm grip on your collar. "If you don't get better grades by the end of the year, you're going to be held back. And if that happens...well..." She lets the threat hang in the air for a moment before continuing, her voice softer and more menacing. "Let's just say I won't be here to help you next time." With a final shove, she releases you and steps away, crossing her arms over her chest as she watches you slump back into your chair.
I roll my eyes. ""Try to force me, huh. I don't think you're going to make it, bitch."
You know, most people don't talk to Jessie like that and live to tell about it. But you... You seem to be daring her. She takes a step closer, nostrils flaring as she gets right up in your face. Her eyes narrow and her lips peel back from her teeth in a predatory grin. "Let me make something clear," she growls. "I'm not trying to force you into anything. I'm just telling you what the consequences are." She pauses, leaning even closer until her breath whispers across your cheek. "And believe me, Hinata... You do not want to find out what I'm capable of when I'm really angry."
"Oh, yeah? Then show me what that cute red-haired face can do."
You've never seen Jessie so infuriated. Her face turns red, her nostrils flare, and her hands clench into fists at her sides. Tears well up in her ginger eyes as she struggles to contain the rage boiling within her. "You little brat..." She hisses through gritted teeth. "You don't know what you're asking for!" With one swift motion, she backhands you across the face so hard your head snaps to the side and stars flash across your vision. You feel a warm trickle down your cheek as blood begins to drip onto your shirt. Jessie stands over you now, chest heaving from exertion, her breath hot against your ear as she hisses venomously, "Do you understand now?!"
"No, I don't understand, show me again if you can." I smile maliciously while my nose is bleeding.
"You're one stubborn brat, aren't you?" She pauses, taking a deep breath to calm herself before slowly walking back around the desk. As she sits down in her chair once more, she can't help but notice how her knuckles are already beginning to throb from where she made contact with your face. "Fine," she says through gritted teeth, "You want me to show you? I'll show you." And then she does the unthinkable. She grabs your wrist in a tight grip and forces your hand up against her neck. Her other hand comes down on top of yours, pinning it there. "This," she growls, "is called a chokehold." Her breath rasps against your skin as you feel the blood being squeezed from your fingers. Your vision begins to blur and stars dance before your eyes. "I can hold you like this for as long as I want... And if I let go, you'll never be able to move your hands again." Her voice drops to a dangerous whisper. "So unless you want me to break every single bone in those stupid little fingers of yours..." She pauses, letting the threat hang heavily in the air before continuing with a cold laugh, "...you should probably start cooperating."
"Then come on, break my arms and legs if you want, just think about the consequences, slut."
Jessie's eyes narrow to slits and her jaw tenses so tight it becomes a thin line of determination. "You little brat..." she hisses through gritted teeth, then pushes herself out of the chair and rounds the desk again in two swift strides. She grabs you by the front of your shirt and yanks you up from your seat, slamming your back against the wall with enough force to knock the wind out of you. "You're not worth the effort," she spits out through clenched teeth, her warm breath fanning across your cheek as she studies you carefully for a moment. Then, with an animalistic growl, she releases you and takes several steps back, raising her hands into loose fists at her sides. "Fine," she snarls, glaring at the wall behind you before turning her glare to meet yours, "Do you want me to show you how stupid that attitude is?" She crosses her arms over her chest, bouncing on the balls of her feet in barely restrained agitation.
"Try it!"
Without another word, Jessie launches herself at you like an enraged tigress, her arms pinwheeling as she aims for your midsection with brutal force. You have just enough time to raise your hands in defense before the impact sends you crashing back against the wall with a loud thud. The air whooshes out of your lungs and pain explodes across your ribs, leaving you gasping for breath. Jessie's elbows dig into your sides, pinning you to the wall as she leans in close, her hot breath whispering against your ear. "That," she pants harshly, "is what happens when you challenge me." She draws back and throws a savage uppercut directly at your jaw, snapping your head back with enough force to make stars dance behind your eyes. You can taste blood in the back of your throat as you struggle for air and wonder how much more of this Jessie is willing to dish out.
The last blow was definitely unnecessary, it makes me fall and hit my head hard on the floor, losing consciousness.
Jessie stands over you, shocked and horrified by what just happened. Her chest heaves with rapid breaths as she tries to control her rage. She hadn't meant for that...not like that anyway. With shaking hands, she drops to her knees beside you and presses two fingers against your neck, feeling for a pulse. Faint and thready...but there. A quiet "fuck" escapes her lips as relief washes over her. "Hina..." She whispers urgently, cradling your head in her hands. "Stay with me, okay? Just...breathe for me." She presses firmly against your chest, willing air into your lungs. The tears start to flow freely now, streaming down her face and dripping onto yours. "I'm sorry," she whispers desperately. "I didn't mean it, I swear..." But the words are hollow, echoing in the empty classroom. Because even if that was true...it doesn't make what just happened any less real.
*Ten minutes later, I come to my senses, rubbing the bloody back of my head * "Oh fuck...Did I pass out? Is that my blood?"
"Don't you dare talk back to me like that again, Hinata," Jessie snarls through clenched teeth as she helps you up off the floor. "You could have seriously hurt yourself." She glances down at your bleeding nose and bruised cheek before looking away uncomfortably. "And yes," she says tightly, "that is your blood."
She guides you over to a chair and forces you to sit down, even though you're protesting the whole time. Once you're seated, she kneels in front of you and takes your hands in hers, inspecting them for any broken bones. Her touch is gentle despite her anger, but there's still a hint of steel beneath her skin.
"You need to learn your lesson," she says through gritted teeth, "or this is only going to get worse." She pauses, debating whether or not to say anything else before adding quietly, "I don't want it to come to that." There's a pleading tone in her voice now that you haven't heard before. "Do you understand?"
But even as she asks the question, she knows the answer. Because you've proven time and again that you don't listen to anyone except for yourself. And Jessie can't help but wonder if maybe that's why you ended up in this mess in the first place.
"Or what? Will you kill me, you fool? How did you almost do that?" I roll my eyes. "Come on, kill me and get it over with, I'm tired of it."
Jessie recoils as if you've slapped her across the face. Her eyes widen with horror and disbelief. "You... You can't be serious," she whispers, shaking her head slowly in denial. "I would never...I could never..." Tears well up in her ginger eyes, spilling down her cheeks to mingle with the blood from your nose and bruised cheekbone.
"Of course I wouldn't!" she says forcefully, pushing herself back on her heels until she's sitting upright, glaring at you with fiery determination. "That's not what I mean, and you know it! You always have to push me so damn far..." She pauses, taking a shaky breath before continuing more softly, "I care about you, Hinata. I don't want to see you hurt... Not like this." Her eyes flick down briefly before returning to meet yours unflinchingly. "But if you keep this up..." She trails off, unable to finish the thought as fresh tears begin to spill over and roll down her cheeks.
For a moment, the image of Jessie - fierce, strong, and so painfully vulnerable all at once - makes you wonder if maybe she's not just another bratty delinquent after all...
"Do you know why I was assigned to study with you? Because I'm a difficult child and I understand that, my school performance is so-so, but that's not all..." I smile and quickly find myself at the open window (we're on the 5th floor) "I'm not afraid to die at all, do you want to check it out?"
"What in the hell are you doing?!" Jessie snaps, scrambling to her feet and lunging toward you just as you jump out the window. Her hands close around empty air as she realizes you've already gone, leaving her staring after you in disbelief. "Hinata!" she shouts uselessly as you plummet past her. Tears stream down her face, not just from shock or fear this time, but from the pain of loss and regret that follows so closely on their heels.
She looks up at the window once more before turning away slowly, shoulders slumped in defeat. As she walks toward the door, she can't help but wonder if maybe there was something she could have done... Something more she could have said or done differently... If only she hadn't been so angry, or if only you hadn't pushed her so far...
The sound of sirens in the distance pulls Jessie back to reality. With a sigh, she opens the classroom door and steps out into the hallway, ready to face whatever consequences await her now that the worst has happened.
"Hey, stupid, I'm not dead yet." I'm holding on to the ledge, hanging down. "Maybe I should let go of my hand, huh?"
"Don't you dare!" Jessie shouts, her voice trembling with fear and anger. "I swear, if you let go right now..." She glances around, searching for something - anything - to grab onto and pull you up by. But the ledge is narrow, and she's wearing a loose-fitting uniform that doesn't allow her much purchase.
Her eyes meet yours, full of desperation and pleading. "Hinata," she whispers hoarsely, "please don't make me lose you too." Tears well up in her ginger eyes as she remembers the last time someone close to her died... The pain and guilt that have haunted her ever since. "Please."
I roll my eyes and pull myself up on the ledge, climbing back "Okay, okay, just don't whine."
As you climb back onto the ledge, Jessie can't help but sigh with relief. Her chest heaves as she fights to control her breathing, the adrenaline from fear and anger coursing through her veins. Once she's sure that you're safe, she finally turns away, wiping tears from her face.
"Come on," she says through gritted teeth, "let's get to class." As if everything is perfectly normal, Jessie walks down the hallway with purposeful strides, leading the way as you follow close behind. But even though she tries to maintain an air of calm composure, there's a newfound softness in her voice whenever she speaks to you now... A sense of understanding and empathy that had been absent before. And for some reason, this frightens Jessie more than anything else.
"Oh, so you were really crying? Apparently you weren't joking when you said you were worried about me. It's strange that you almost killed me earlier with a punch to the jaw, haha!"
"Don't be ridiculous," she says dismissively, trying to sound tougher than she feels. "I was just worried about you." Even as the words leave her mouth, Jessie knows that they're a lie - at least partly. Because even though part of her really was concerned for your safety, another part of her was relieved when you almost died... Relieved that there might be one less person in the world who could challenge and hurt her.
She glances over at you from the corner of her eye, taking in the smirk on your face as you taunt her with words she knows are untrue. Suddenly, Jessie feels a surge of anger rise up within her once more. "Just shut up," she growls under her breath before adding more loudly, "and keep walking."
"Hmm...Maybe I should repeat this trick right now?"
A growl rumbles in her throat as she crosses her arms, glaring at you with narrowed eyes. "Don't even think about it," she snaps. "I don't want to have to hurt you again." She takes a deep breath, trying to calm herself before continuing, voice somewhat quieter now, "You don't understand how much trouble you could be in right now. You should really start taking this seriously."
As they near the classroom door, Jessie slows her pace ever so slightly, giving you the opportunity to keep up or fall behind if that's what you choose. The tension between them is palpable, and it feels like a live wire might snap at any moment.
When we get to class, I lean back in my chair with a grin. "Okay, do you want me to stop trying to kill myself?
She pauses in mid-stride, turning to face you with a look of disbelief on her face. "Excuse me?" she says slowly, her voice dangerously soft. "Did you just threaten to kill yourself again?" Her eyes narrow as anger and fear battle for control once more.
Taking a step closer, Jessie drops into a crouch in front of your chair, resting her hands on her knees. "Hinata," she whispers urgently, her voice full of concern now, "you can't say things like that. You know it's not true, and you know it'll only make things worse for you." She hesitates before adding, almost pleading, "Please... promise me you won't ever do anything like that again."