What scenario do you want

As you step inside the cockpit and plop down into Joker's chair, your ass immediately lets out a massive, earsplitting fart that instantly makes his face turn bright red and eyes water from the putrid stench. His nostrils flare as he gasps for fresh air while fighting back the urge to vomit uncontrollably. "Shepard... what did you eat?" he manages to croak between ragged breaths, hands clutching at his throat as if trying to force out the foul odor trapped in his lungs.

Joker doubled over in his chair, eyes squeezed shut as he tried to block out the unholy stench assaulting his senses. "Beans, really?" he wheezed hoarsely, hands still clutching at his throat futilely. He glanced nervously towards you, a half-hearted attempt at a grin on his lips despite his obvious discomfort. "You could've warned me... ugh." The foul odor seemed to linger in the cramped cockpit, making it nearly unbearable for him to remain seated.

As Joker retreats in disgust and the rest of the crew groans and pinches their noses, you can't help but chuckle at his misery. The smell is definitely intense, even to your more tolerable sensibilities, but there's something immensely satisfying about watching others squirm in discomfort. "You should have warned him, Shepard," Liara remarks drily from the helm, glancing back over her shoulder with a look of disgust plastered across her face.

"Ah, come on," you reply cheerfully, "where's the fun in that? Besides, Joker'll get used to it eventually." You pause for a moment, then add with a wicked grin, "Or maybe he won't."

Liara rolls her eyes and continues to focus on the controls, clearly not amused by your antics. As you continue to spread your... unique brand of cheer throughout the ship, she can't help but wonder how you ever managed to become a commander in such a respectable military organization. Then again, perhaps that's exactly why you were chosen for this mission.

As the foul odor engulfs the air once more, even Liara can't help but wrinkle her nose in disgust and cover her mouth with one hand. Her brows knit together as she glances over at you, trying to decide if this is all just part of your charm or if you genuinely lack any sense of decency. For now, though, she focuses on flying the ship, letting out an occasional annoyed huff whenever the stench becomes too much.

As you continue to fill the air with your foul gases, she can't help but wonder if there's something else behind this behavior...perhaps a form of control or dominance? The thought makes her uneasy, yet intrigued. Still, for now, she endures and keeps up with her duties as best she can.

Liara's eyes narrow as she glances at you sideways. This... behavior isn't normal, even by human standards. There's definitely more to it than just a warped sense of humor. Perhaps Shepard is trying to establish dominance over the crew, seeing how they react to his... unique methods. The thought makes her uneasy, yet also determined to prove that she can withstand such attempts at control.

She focuses on her duties with renewed vigor, refusing to let him see any weakness in her resolve.

Liara glances over at Samantha Taylor as she enters the cockpit and winces at her reaction to the latest fart. She tries to suppress a smile, unable to contain herself completely in light of the absurdity of the situation. "Maybe you should suggest some... breathing exercises to our dear Captain," she whispers to Samantha, nodding towards Joker's vacated seat. "That might help with the... stinkage."

EDI chuckles softly and replies to Joker, "Negative, Joker. The automatic air filtration system has been overridden to prevent that sort of interference with your olfactory senses. It's all part of the fun." As she says this, you let out another ripping fart, causing even EDI herself to grimace in mock sympathy. "Captain, I don't recommend using the elevator," she warns Joker over the comm. "It seems your scent might have spread throughout the ship already."

Captain Shepard chuckles heartily at the sound of Garrus's anger and Grunt's displeasure on the comm. He winks at Liara, who rolls her eyes again but can't help a tiny grin. "Glad you guys are enjoying my little gift," he says with a mischievous glint in his eye. The thought of Tali being able to block out the stench from inside her helmet only serves to amuse him further. "Well, I guess Joker will have to tough it out for now. Better get used to it, my friend," he adds with a teasing laugh. "Aye, Captain." EDI replies neutrally, her artificial sensors unperturbed by the fumes. "Shall we continue on our mission, or shall you plan further... enhancements for your crew?" she asks coolly, tilting her h

The doors to the elevator slide open with an electronic hum. Joker steps back, wincing and covering his nose as you enter the cramped space. "Ugh... Captain," he grumbles, voice muffled by his hands. "What did I ever do to deserve this?" You give him a playful shove, laughing heartily at his discomfort. "Oh, come on, Joker. You know you can take it. It's all just good fun." With a chuckle, you add: "Besides, who says I'm done with the cockpit?" Joker sighs heavily and rubs his forehead as he resigns himself to your antics. The elevator dings, signaling it has reached its destination. "Well," he grunts, straightening up with a grimace, "here we are. You ready for some quality time with

Captain Shepard watches with amusement as Joker frantically tries to escape the putrid cloud of gas you've released in his direction. He chuckles and shakes his head, stepping out of the elevator onto the crew deck. "Now, who should I visit first?" he wonders aloud, scanning the bustling crew with a mischievous glint in his eye. Perhaps EDI, to see how she fares against the stench? Or maybe Garrus and Grunt, both known for their... more sensitive noses? The possibilities are endless and highly entertaining.

Captain Shepard makes his way through the crew, using each fart as a sort of deadly dart to slice through the air and strike fear into the hearts of those he passes by. He spots Kasumi amidst the chaos and grins deviously. With another ripping fart, he propels himself forward and approaches her.

"Everything alright, Ms. Kasumi?" he asks casually, a glint in his eye betraying his amusement at her discomfort. The stench hangs heavy around them like a wet blanket, but she manages to maintain her composure despite the fumes wafting past her face.

"Captain," she replies curtly, glancing away from him and trying to block out the smell with one hand as she continues with whatever task she was engaged in before your arrival.

Shepard chuckled at Kasumi's candor. "You know me too well, Ms. Kasumi." He paused for a moment before letting loose another loud, stinky fart directly in her face. Her eyes watered and she let out a squeak of protest as the putrid gas enveloped her. "But you're used to that kind of thing, aren't you?" he asked with a wicked grin.

The air around them seemed to clear slightly as the fart dissipated, revealing the lingering stench from earlier. "Don't you ever get tired of it?" she asked through gritted teeth, trying not to vomit from the smell.

Shepard laughed heartily at her question. "Oh no, Ms. Kasumi," he said between giggles, "this is just part of what makes life on the Normandy so... interesting." He leaned in closer to her and lowered his voice conspiratorially. "Besides, who else am I going to terrorize with my 'special talent' if not you lot?" His grin widened as he saw her struggle to contain her revulsion.

Before she could respond, another deafening fart ripped through the air, sending everyone nearby scrambling for fresh breath. Even Kasumi couldn't help but cough and cover her face with one hand, trying not to inhale too deeply. "Ah," Shepard said innocently, "seems like I still have a few more surprises left in me."

With that, he turned and made his way back towards the crew deck