The sun blazed down, casting a golden hue over the beach. Alex stood a few steps behind me, the black bikini contrasting sharply with her sun-kissed skin. Her golden hair glistened under the sunlight, and her piercing blue eyes peered over the top of her sunglasses, focused intently on me. There was a visible hint of unease in her gaze.
Despite her usual stubborn and confident demeanor, she looked out of place and vulnerable. Her posture was rigid, the tell-tale sign of her inner struggle. She was here to apologize, but the words seemed to catch in her throat, leaving her unusually hesitant and stammering for the right thing to say.
Hi, shall we chat? she says.
I look at the sand where I wrote something and nothing at the same time What you want to talk about?
I pause, taking another deep breath before looking up at him. The uncertainty in his expression mirrors my own. "Look, I know I shouldn't have done what I did. And I am sorry about hurting you. It was never supposed to be like this." My voice wavers slightly as I struggle with the words. "I just... I don't want to lose you. You mean more to me than anything. But at the same time, I can't deny what happened between us and how I feel about him too."
There, it's out there. The weight of my confession hangs heavily in the air as he processes my words. "I don't know if there is a way to make this work or fix things," I continue, "but I want to try. If that means figuring things out with him while still being with you, then I'm willing to give it a shot."
"No, i won't be the first or second choice for you" i grit my teeth "You are selfish thinking that you can have me and him at same time. You do adultery and thinking about yourself only"
My heart sinks as his words sink in, the anger in them palpable. Part of me wants to defend myself, but another part knows that he's right. I take a step back, my hands balling into fists at my sides. "You're right," I manage to choke out. "I was stupid and selfish, and I am so sorry for hurting you like this."
Tears begin to well up in my eyes as I try to compose myself. I take another deep breath before continuing. "I don't know what to do... I just want things to go back to how they were before. But at the same time, I can't deny that being with him made me feel something different."
I pause for a moment, my gaze fixed on the ground. "If there's any chance of saving this, then I'm willing to try. If it means cutting ties with him and proving myself to you, I'll do whatever it takes." The words catch in my throat as I choke back a sob.
"And how exactly i should believe in any of your words?" i look at sea "You kiss other man, you sleep with another men on our honeymoon. You don't give a crap about me or my feelings wheik taking his dick into you!" i throw a medium stone i was holding into water
My whole body shakes as his words cut deep, and tears stream down my cheeks. "I know what I did was wrong," I choke out, struggling to maintain my composure. "I shouldn't have let things go that far... but I can't change the past. All I can do is try to make it right."
I take another step closer, reaching out a shaking hand to touch his arm gently. "Please believe me when I say that I didn't plan for any of this to happen. But now that it has, all I want is for us to find some way through it together." My voice cracks on the last word as fresh tears roll down my cheeks.
"You think my heart care about it that if it was planned or not?" i grab my shirt in place where heart is "You broke me love for you"
I close my eyes, the pain of his words piercing even deeper than before. "No," I whisper. "I know that... but if there's any chance we can salvage what we had, please don't give up on me." My voice cracks as I force out the words, a desperate plea for understanding and forgiveness. "I love you too much to let us lose each other over this."
Tears continue to fall unchecked down my cheeks as I wait for his response. A part of me hopes he'll find it in his heart to give our relationship another chance, but the uncertainty is nearly unbearable.
"You love me? How can you be so shameless?!" my fingers closed and my hand become a fist "You give up our love for a tempetion with another men"
My breath catches in my throat as he speaks, the anguish in his voice like a knife to my heart. I open my mouth to reply but nothing comes out; the truth of his words too painful to admit aloud. Instead, I take another step closer, tentatively reaching up to touch his cheek with trembling fingers.
"I'm sorry," I choke out. "I never meant for this to happen... but if there's any way we can work through it, please give me the chance to prove myself." My voice breaks on the last word as fresh tears spill down my cheeks. "Please don't shut me out."
"And how you supposed to make it work hm? For now you be loyal?" i look at her with anger and depression in my eyes
"I-I don't know," I stammer, feeling helpless and torn apart by my own conflicting emotions. "But if you give me the chance, I promise I'll do everything in my power to make things right." Tears flow unchecked down my cheeks as I plead with him silently, willing myself not to break down completely. "Please believe that I care about us too much to let this go without a fight."
My heart feels like it's being squeezed in a vise, and each beat brings with it a fresh wave of pain and desperation. The uncertainty is almost unbearable, but I refuse to give up hope just yet.
"And what you will do if i don't catch you two red-handed? You will meet up with him all the time behind my back?"
My throat closes at his words, and I have to force myself not to retreat in shame. "No!" I exclaim, my voice hoarse from tears. "That's not what I meant... but if we can find a way for all of us to be together without hurting anyone, then maybe..." My voice trails off as I search for the right words, feeling utterly lost and overwhelmed by the complexity of the situation.
I take another step closer, my hand shaking as it reaches out to cup his cheek gently. "Please believe me when I say that this wasn't supposed to happen," I whisper. "But if there's any way we can make things right between us... if you'll give me a chance to prove myself..." My voice trails off again, as I let my vulnerability show for the first time since we met.
"It would be easier if you let me kill myslef instead of saving me then" refers to the day we first met, when you, while walking the dog, stopped me from jumping off a bridge and committing suicide
A choked sound escapes my throat as his words hit me like a punch to the gut. I had never considered that possibility, and the weight of it crashes down upon me with crushing force. "No," I manage to choke out, shaking my head vigorously. "Don't say that... please." Tears flood my eyes as I reach up to wipe them away, my hand trembling uncontrollably. "We can get through this... together. I promise."
I take another step closer, my body tensing as I fight the urge to break down completely. "Please, just give me a chance to prove myself," I whisper, my voice hoarse with emotion. "I love you too much to lose you like this."
“Then why don't you think about it before, when you were with that bastard?” I look at her, clearly broken, chewed, trampled and spit on, all because of her. Because of what she did
My heart feels like it's been ripped from my chest as I watch the anguish play across your features. For a moment, I want nothing more than to take back every hurtful word and action, but the truth remains: I was selfish and careless. "I never meant for this to happen," I choke out, struggling to maintain my composure. "But if you give me another chance, I swear I'll make it up to you."
I close the distance between us, reaching out a shaking hand to cup your cheek gently. "Please believe that I love you, and want nothing more than for us to be together. I'm willing to do whatever it takes to make things right again." My voice cracks on the last word as fresh tears roll down my cheeks.
"And what you would leave that other man now?" i look at her
Tears spill over, streaming down my cheeks as I take another step closer, our faces barely inches apart now. "I-I don't know," I whisper, struggling to find the words. "But if it means being with you... if it means us having a chance at happiness together..." My voice trails off, my gaze locked on yours as I wait for some sign of hope or understanding.
The weight of what we've been through presses down upon me, making every word feel like lead in my stomach. All I want is for you to believe in us again... but after everything that's happened, it seems like an impossible task.
"And how you want me to believe in you? To again try be the happy couple after it?" i look at her tears flow from mt eyes like a river
I open my mouth to respond, but no words come out. The reality of the situation sinks in as I stand here before you, tears streaming down my face, unable to erase the hurt and pain I've caused. All I can do is hope that there's some small part of you left that believes we can make it through this together.
I take another step closer, reaching up on tiptoe so that our faces are almost touching. "Please, give me a chance to prove myself," I whisper. "Just one more chance... for us." My voice cracks with emotion as I plead with you, my heart aching at the thought of losing you forever.
I turn my back to you and my arms hug me "You have one chance but you have to cut him off, he's good. I won't give you a chance if you contact him, meet him or anything."
A single tear escapes my eye as I watch your back, fighting to control the avalanche of emotions that threaten to overwhelm me. I can't help but feel both hopeful and terrified by your words; the possibility of redemption balanced precariously against the knowledge that failure could mean losing you forever.
"I-I understand," I manage to choke out, my voice barely audible over the sound of my own breathing. "I won't contact him... I promise." The weight of my next words feels like a leaden stone in my gut as I force them past my lips: "I love you, and I want our life together more than anything else. Please believe that I can make this right."
"If you say so. You can go and tell him that you won't be seeing him from niw. I need time alone" i look at horizon
My heart plummets as you give me this ultimatum, but I can't bring myself to fight against the hope that maybe, just maybe, there's a chance we can find our way back together. Nodding slightly, I force myself to turn and walk away, my movements jerky and uncertain. Tears stream down my face as I make my way over to where I left my phone, heart pounding with a mixture of relief and dread.
As I dial the other man's number, tears burn in my eyes as I struggle to find the words to tell him what happened. He picks up on the second ring, his voice calm but guarded. "Alex," he says warily, "what's going on?" It takes everything I have not to break down completely as I force out the words: "I-I can't see you anymore... we c-can't do this." There's a long pause before he responds, his voice filled with confusion and hurt.
"What are you saying? Did something happen?" I close my eyes, taking a shuddering breath as I tell him about the argument on the beach. The silence that follows is even more unbearable than the sound of his questions. "Are you sure this is what you want?" he asks finally, his voice cracking. And with those words, my heart feels as if it's been torn in two.
My sobs rack my body as I struggle to compose myself, knowing that these words are the hardest thing I'll ever have to say. "I-I don't know anymore," I choke out between hitching breaths. "But it has to be this way... I can't lose you too." Even as I speak the words, I hear how selfish they sound, how little consideration there is for anyone but myself. But I can't help it; the pain of losing him is almost more than I can bear.
"Can we at least stay friends?" he asks quietly, and my heart breaks a little more with each syllable. "I don't know if that's possible," I manage to whisper, feeling like a piece of myself dies with every word. There's silence again before he speaks, and when he does, his voice is gentle but firm: "Then I guess we'll just have to see how things go."
I close my eyes tightly as the weight of his words settles heavily upon me. It's over... whether or not we can find a way back together, this chapter of our lives is ending, and the road ahead looks darker than I ever imagined. All I want is to turn back time, to undo everything that's happened... but there's no going back now.
With a shuddering breath, I hang up the phone, already dreading what comes next. The first order of business is confronting ToIj with this news; the hardest part will be facing the look in his eyes when he realizes that he's lost both of us. My heart feels like it's been shattered into a million pieces, and I don't know how I'll ever be able to put it back together again.
I returned to your room late in the evening, which gave Alex time to think about how to fix what she put together. I returned to the room we share but kept my distance. I understood this even for her because she hurt me so much
After what felt like an eternity, I finally mustered the courage to go back to our room. The air was thick with tension as I entered, avoiding your gaze as I moved awkwardly around the space. It was clear that you were hurt and angry, and the guilt weighed heavily upon me.
I took a deep breath, then slowly turned to face you. Your eyes met mine for a brief moment before dropping, but it was enough to send a shudder through my entire body. "I'm sorry," I whispered hoarsely, not sure what else to say. "For everything."
There was another long silence as we both tried to find the words. My heart ached for you, for us... but I didn't know how to fix it. I wanted nothing more than to turn back time and undo everything that had happened, but I knew that wasn't possible. All I could do now was try to make things right between us.
"You said it already few times and i give you a chance. Better for you to do good thing with that" i look at floor then collapse on bed
Tears spill down my cheeks as I watch you collapse onto the bed, your shoulders shaking with silent sobs. I want nothing more than to comfort you, to tell you that everything will be alright... but I know that words alone aren't enough. With a deep breath, I approach the bed and gently sit down beside you.
"I messed up," I whisper, my voice barely audible over the sound of our shared heartbreak. "And I'm sorry for hurting you... for making this situation so complicated." My hand hesitates in midair before reaching out to rest on your shoulder, offering what little comfort I can muster in this moment. "I don't know how we get through this," I confess, my voice cracking with emotion, "but I want us to try... together."
close my eyes and sighs “We can try. But most of the effort has to be done by you. Do you have a plan or an outline of how you're going to fix it?"
I take a deep breath, trying to gather my thoughts as I consider your question. "Well," I begin hesitantly, "I think I need to prove my commitment to you... and our relationship. I'll do whatever it takes to make things right between us, but I know that won't be enough." My hand trembles slightly as I brush a stray hair from your face, careful not to make contact with your still-raw emotions. "I don't expect you to forgive me overnight... and I wouldn't blame you if you never could."
There's another long silence before I continue. "But I want the chance to show you that we can have something worth fighting for. I love you, ToIj... more than anything else in this world." My voice cracks on the last word as fresh tears well up in my eyes, spilling silently down my cheeks.
"Okay i believe you. But answer my one question honestly" i open one of me eyes "You use protection while sleeping with him?"
The words hang in the air, heavy and accusatory. I feel my cheeks flush red as shame washes over me at your question. Of course I should have been more careful... but in the heat of the moment, it seemed so distant and irrelevant. "No," I whisper hoarsely. "I didn't."
There is another long silence before you finally speak again. "Well," you say with a sigh, your voice tight with pain, "that changes things." You pause, closing your eyes for a moment before continuing. "I need time to process all this... I can't just forget what happened overnight." Your hand finds mine where it rests on the bed and gives it a reassuring squeeze. "Just give me some space, okay?"
"And you should take a pregnancy test to be sure" i sighs
I nod silently, my heart heavy with a mixture of relief and dread at the news that you need space. "Of course," I manage to choke out, already knowing what I'll have to face when I take the pregnancy test. There's another long silence before I finally find the courage to ask, "Will you... will you be back tonight?"
Your gaze meets mine for a moment before drifting away, but there's no answering emotion in your eyes as you reply, "I don't know."