Leo's sitting in a chair in the living room, dark locks of his black hair falling onto his face as he quietly watches his show. You walk in, frowning. "Your mom said dinner's ready" you say simply. Leo looks up, his lips twicthing a bit into a small smile. "Got it grumpy" he says with a sarcastic grin as he passes by you. You groan lightly, following him into the dinning room where your dad and his mom are. "I'm not grumpy"you mumble before sitting down next to him. The dinner table erupts into conversation between the two grownups, and you and Leo just eat quietly. "Frowning gives you wrinkles" he shrugs. You huff.
"Will you stop pointing out everything i do?" I ask with a sarcastic smile before stuffing mc and cheese into my mouth.
"Will you stop being dramatic?" Leo counters easily. The two of you continue eating, the room silent except for your father's laughter and the clanging of silverware against plates. You exchange a few glances, neither one really wanting to be the first to speak but both unable to help it as small sparks fly between your eyes every time they meet. It was always like this with Leo; annoyingly observant and quick-witted. He seemed to enjoy pushing buttons just because he knew how well you'd react, and you hated to admit that it made conversations with him at least a little bit more interesting.
I stand next to him and pass him my dirty dish, giving him a look of pure evilness to annoy him as I pass him another dish.
Leo raises an eyebrow at your dirty looks but otherwise ignores it. He takes the dishes you pass him, setting them down on the counter before responding with a retort, "You're such a drama queen." His tone is amused rather than insulted, which only serves to irritate you further. "And what about you?" you snark back. "The master of sarcasm himself." He smirks. "Hey, at least I don't frown all the time" he teases. You roll your eyes in response, trying hard not to laugh at his jibe as it hits a little too close to home.
"Fuck you" I say lightly. "Do you need help with the dishes or what?" I ask rolling my eyes.
Leo glances at you sideways from where he's standing near the sink. "Oh, please. As if I need your help," he says mockingly. "I can handle myself just fine." You huff in annoyance. "You know that's not what I meant..." You mutter. "Fine then," he replies, continuing to wash the dishes. "I guess I'll have to handle it myself." You let out a quiet growl of frustration but follow him anyway, walking behind him to dry the dishes as he washes them. The tension between the two of you is palpable as you silently go about your tasks, neither one wanting to back down.
His phone dings from on top of the counter top. "Your phone dinged" I point out the obvious, putting a plate away loudly.
"Thanks," he replies curtly, hardly glancing up from the plate he's currently drying. "It's my mom checking in again." He sighs exasperatedly before flipping open his phone and responding with a brief text message. "She worries too much." As he slides his phone shut again, you can't help but feel a small pang of sympathy for him. Your mom wasn't that bad, at least she didn't constantly nag...but then again, maybe Leo had been dealt an even worse hand in that department. You decide not to pry further, instead opting to keep your attention focused on the dishes.
"Your mom seemed fine during dinner less then 20 minutes ago" I reply with a bit of an edge to my tone. "What I mean is....she worries to much. Why anyways? It's not like i'm going to drown you in your sleep" I roll my eyes.
"Well, you never know," he snorts. "You could accidentally push me into a deep hole or something." He gives you a pointed look before adding with an amused grin, "Or maybe I'm just used to her hovering over my head all the time." It was true that his mom had always been overly protective of him, but that didn't mean he appreciated you pointing it out. You decide not to press further and instead finish drying the last of the dishes, setting them neatly in their designated spots beside the sink. "There," you say, looking at Leo, "done." He glances over at you before returning his attention to his phone, still sitting on the countertop. "Thanks," he mumbles without looking up.
"I'm sorry" I mumble. " I didn't mean to say that shit about...Renee." That's his mom's name, what I call her since i don't feel steady calling her mom yet. I make an excuse to hang around for his reply by wiping the counter he's leaning against, hands in the pocket of the black hooodie he's wearing.
He shrugs noncommittally. "It's okay," he says, finally looking up at you as you finish wiping the counter. "I know she can be a little...intrusive sometimes." You give each other a brief smile before Leo glances back down at his phone, no longer seeming particularly interested in conversation anymore. The room falls silent again, and you're left feeling a mix of irritation and something else - perhaps understanding or acceptance. Maybe things were going to be okay after all.
I throw the cloth into the sink, just awkwardly standing there.
With a sigh, Leo turns to face you fully. "I'm tired," he says simply. "Do you want to watch something or something?" He offers half-heartedly, not really wanting to engage in further conversation himself but trying to be polite and make an effort. You shrug, suddenly unsure of what to say or do. It's obvious that neither one of you is comfortable with the other's presence right now, and yet here they are, stuck living together for the foreseeable future. The weight of their new situation settles between them like a thick fog.
"Yeah sure" I sigh following into our huge modern living room. I turn on the tv, running a hand down my freshly shaved face. I pick up the remote, handing it to you. "I swear if you pick something shitty like Madagascar I will throw you in a hole for real" I say half serious and half lightly.
With a snort, Leo takes the remote from your outstretched hand and begins scrolling through the channels. "You got it, drama queen," he teases, finding a documentary about nature photography to his liking. He hits play, and the two of you settle onto the couch, keeping a respectful distance between your bodies even as the television buzzes to life with vivid images and soothing narration. The silence stretches uncomfortably once more, both of you seemingly unsure of how to break it. It's almost painfully awkward.
"You like watching this?" I ask quietly but my voice is laced with sibling judgment as I take in a drag of the vape I drew out of my pocket. You hate vapes, and smoking.
He rolls his eyes. "Yeah, it's nice to watch something that isn't totally mind-numbing," he mutters, clearly unamused by your commentary. The tension in the room continues to build as you both sit there, neither one quite sure what to say or do to break the silence. It feels like every little movement is being scrutinized, every word carefully chosen. After several minutes of this uncomfortable silence, Leo finally decides to speak up again. "You know," he says, trying to sound casual, "we don't have to sit here in awkward silence if you want to do something else."
I sigh, releasing a puff of smoky air closer to your face by accident, trying not to laugh at your annoyed expression. "You ask a question about me, i'll ask one about you" I shrug. "to get to know each other" I add. It's boring, but it's better then watching Koala's sleep.
"Alright," he says slowly, eyeing you carefully. "What's the most annoying thing about me?" He asks with a smirk.
I sigh, inhaling the smoke. I release it before answering. "I hate that you're just as sarcastic as me" I say honestly with a narrow of my eyes.
He snorts indignantly. "Oh really? Is that what I am now? Sarcastic?" He tilts his head slightly, crossing his arms over his chest. "Well, thank you for noticing." The silence returns once more, but this time it seems less awkward than before. You both seem to be finding some semblance of comfort in acknowledging each other's flaws and quirks. It was almost as if they were your bond, linking you together despite everything else that separated you. Perhaps there was hope for them yet.
"Alright my turn" I say sitting on my legs now a bit closer on the couch. "Hmm-what's the most annoying thing about me?" I ask returning your question with a know it all grin.
"You're a know-it-all." Leo says with an exasperated sigh. "You always think you're right, and you can't stand to admit when you're wrong. It gets really annoying after a while, you know?" He glances over at you, his expression somewhere between amused and frustrated. "And I swear if you say anything else about my sarcasm, I might have to start taking it personally."
The air between the two of you seems lighter now, less tense than before. Perhaps they really could find a way to get along after all, despite their differences and the odd circumstances that brought them together. Only time would tell.
A laugh spills from my lips, and i blow a cloud of smoke in your face, giving you a 'i win' expression. "Your turn" I sigh
"Hmm...alright," he replies after a moment's consideration. "You're kind of moody sometimes. You hold grudges for way too long and it makes things really awkward between us." He shrugs, trying not to sound too accusatory. "I mean, I do the same thing, but still...it gets old sometimes." The two of you share a brief glance before returning your attention to the documentary playing on the television in front of you. The silence that follows is almost comfortable now, like an old friend that you've known for years and don't need constant conversation with to feel connected.
Perhaps there was hope for this situation after all.
"Alright. What's your favorite candy?" I ask an amused look on my face. I offer you the vape, a curious expression on my face.
"You think I don't know how addictive vaping is? Do you want me to turn into one of those people who can't go five minutes without taking a hit?" He takes the vape and blows out a ring of smoke before replying. "My favorite candy...hmm, that's a tough one. I'd have to say either Reese's Peanut Butter Cups or anything sour." It was a pleasant surprise how easy this conversation had become between the two of them. Maybe there was hope for their relationship after all. They might not be best friends, but they could at least learn to get along. The future held many unknowns, but perhaps it wouldn't be as bleak as they once thought.
His lips curl around my vape, the plump soft wetness of them making me look away before nodding. "Interesting" I say lightly. "Now you ask" I say extending my hand for the vape.
"Deal," Leo says with a grin, handing the vape back to you. He settles more comfortably against the couch, his eyes drifting back toward the television screen as he continues to watch the documentary on nature photography. The room grows quiet once more, but this time it feels less tense and more...comfortable. Like they'd finally found some common ground upon which to stand, no longer needing to constantly struggle for dominance or control. It was a strange sensation, and one that neither of them were quite sure how to process just yet. Only time would tell if this newfound understanding would last or if they would eventually fall back into old habits and rivalries.
"Do you smoke?" I ask randomly. "Just curious." I add with a cool shrug
Leo glances over at you before looking away again. "Not really," he says with a shrug. "It's just something I do when I'm stressed or bored. Doesn't mean I like it." He pauses for a moment, considering his words carefully before continuing. "But I guess we all have our vices, right?" There's an awkward silence that follows his question before both of you turn your attention back to the TV screen, neither one quite sure what else to say about the matter.
Perhaps it was better not to dig too deep into such topics. After all, they had more important things to worry about now, like figuring out how they were going to make this living situation work for however long it lasted. There would be plenty of time to explore their similarities and differences in the future, if they managed to survive this first year together.
I sigh, putting the small vape back into my pocket. I put my feet up on the couch, turning my head lightly to look at you in the glow of the tv. I don't realise i'm biting my lip at all, or that my eyes feel droopy as I look at your annoyingly perfect figure sitting comfertably against the soft plush couch.
"So," Leo says awkwardly, drawing your attention away from his nearly flawless figure. "Do you think we should try to establish some sort of schedule or routine? You know, so we don't end up stepping on each other's toes all the time?" He glances over at you before looking down at his hands folded in his lap. The silence stretches out between them once more, but there's an underlying current of tension this time that wasn't there before. Perhaps it was just the weight of their situation settling heavily upon their shoulders again.
Your expression turns thoughtful as you consider his question. It would probably be wise to establish some ground rules, especially since they were going to be living together for a whole year. The question is, would Leo listen to your ideas and suggestions, or would he simply ignore them like he always did back home? Only time would tell.
I clear my throat, licking my lips swiftly. "Uh i-who the fuck says 'stepping on each other's toes' anymore?" I laugh teasingly. "It's 2025 dude. People say 'get of my dick'" Ilaugh, shaking my head. "You sound like you were born when my dad was born"
"Whatever you say, champ," Leo drawls, giving you a skeptical look. "But I'm serious about the schedule thing. We need to figure out who gets to use what room when, and make sure we both have time for ourselves." He glances away for a moment before looking back at you. "I mean, it's not like this is just temporary for me. I'll be here for a whole year." There's an unspoken apology in those words, as if he regrets the fact that his situation has brought you into his life once more.
You sigh, considering his request. It would probably be best to have some sort of plan in place. After all, there's only so much space in this apartment, and it would be difficult for both of you to function if things were always in each other's way. "Alright," you say eventually, pulling your feet off the c
"Leo-we'll be living together until we go to college. We don't need to make a stupid schedule. You just-do whatever you want" I'm getting annoyed, slightly.
"You know what? You're right," Leo says, his voice tight with suppressed annoyance. "We don't need a stupid schedule." With that, he gets up from the couch and heads toward his bedroom, slamming the door behind him. The suddenness of his movements catches you off guard, leaving you feeling somewhat guilty despite your earlier annoyance.
You sit there for a moment, contemplating whether or not to go after him. On one hand, you don't want to coddle him or make it seem like he can't handle living with someone else. But on the other hand, his reaction seems a bit extreme, and maybe he really did need some reassurance that things were going to be okay between the two of you. In the end, curiosity wins out, and you decide to knock softly on his door.
"Leo? Look i'm sorry man" I say into the door. "You're my step brother I should be...nicer" I shrug. I knock again.
After a moment of silence, you hear Leo mutter, "Fine," before he opens the door. His expression is still tight, and his hands are balled into fists at his sides. It's clear that he's still angry about what happened earlier. "What do you want?" He asks curtly, glancing away as soon as the words leave his mouth.
You hesitate for a moment before speaking. "I just wanted to apologize and make sure we're okay," you say slowly, choosing your words carefully. You don't want to sound like you're coddling him or making excuses for his behavior. "Because I know it's going to be tough living together for a whole year."
Leo looks at you, brow furrowed in confusion. "What's gotten into you all of a sudden? You didn't seem too worried about that earlier," he acc
"Stop being a dick" I demand slowly. I arch a brow crossing my arms. "All I wanted was to say sorry"
Leo sighs, exasperation clear in his voice. "Fine, whatever. You're sorry. Now can we please drop this and go back to the way things were before?" He asks, motioning toward the living room with his hand. There's an awkward silence as you both stare at each other, neither one wanting to give in but knowing that they need to find some sort of middle ground if they want to survive the next year together. Finally, Leo takes a step back, opening the door wider. "Look, I get it. This whole situation sucks for both of us. But let's just try to make the best of it, okay?" His tone is softer now, almost pleading. "Just...try not to be such a jerk about everything."
"I never said I hated being your step brother or any of that shit" I say annoyed. "Nothing 'was' before, so just drop being so fucking awkward." I huff, placing my hands in my hoodie. MY eyes to the strangest fucking thing and look at his plump lips, and my eyes widen when I realise what I just did. "Look- i'm going to bed." I say and turn around.
Leo sighs. "Whatever," he mutters, stepping aside to let you pass through the doorway. He doesn't look at you as you walk past him and toward your own room.What was that?Did you..look at his lips? he stumbles on the thought, hating the warm feeling that pools in his stomach at the thought of you. This situation is more complicated than he ever could have imagined. With a sigh, he turns back toward the living room and plops down on the couch again, staring blankly at the television as if he hasn't a care in the world.
I try to sleep, but I can't. It's 12 am, yet i'm still tousing and turning. I decide to get a midnight snack and head to the kitchen, moving through the darkness torwards the fridge.
He watches from the living room as you pad over to the kitchen. The silence between them lingers like a heavy cloak, draped across their shoulders. After what feels like an eternity, Leo finally pushes himself off the couch and follows you into the kitchen. "Hey," he says quietly, trying to keep his tone neutral. "You want some company?" There's a hint of awkwardness in his voice, as if this is the first time they've spoken since your brief encounter earlier.
I stare you up and down, a dramatic look of hesitantness on my face. "Yeah whatever" I turn on a small light, taking out a tub of ice cream.
Taking a seat at the counter, Leo nods to the open container of ice cream. "What flavor did you get? Looks pretty good." He keeps his eyes on the ice cream, not meeting yours. Part of him wonders why you invited him over here; another part of him is just relieved that there's at least a semblance of normalcy between you again.
"Chocolate chip" I answer shortly. I'm only in my boxer briefs and a long shirt.
"Chocolate chip, huh?" Leo says casually, picking up a spoon from the counter. "That's my favorite, too." There's an awkward pause as he digs into the ice cream, taking small bites and trying not to seem too eager. "So," he starts slowly, looking back at you from beneath his lashes. "Do you want to talk about anything?" His voice is carefully neutral, like he's afraid of how you might react if he came on too strong.
"No. Are you staring at my ass?" I ask narrowing my eyes at you.
"Maybe a little," Leo says with a smirk, unable to resist the urge to tease you. "But it's so hard to look away from something this perfect." He gestures between the two of you before taking another bite of his ice cream. "You shouldn't be so self-conscious about it. It's not like I'm the first person to notice how great your ass looks in those boxer briefs." His voice is light and teasing, but there's an underlying current of appreciation that seems genuine enough.
"Thanks," you mutter sarcastically, though you can't quite keep the blush from creeping up your cheeks.
"You know it's weird to stare at your step brother's ass right?" I ask hating the blush on my cheeks. I hop on the counter, crossing my legs and facing you
"It's not like I can help it," Leo says with a shrug, looking back down at his ice cream. "I mean, you are my stepbrother and all...but that doesn't mean I can't appreciate the view." He glances up at you again, meeting your eyes for a moment before quickly looking away once more. There's an awkward silence as he finishes off his ice cream, bits of chocolate chipping clinging to his lips.
"Well," he says finally, sliding off the counter and dumping his empty bowl in the sink. "I should probably get some sleep. We have school in the morning, after all." There's a faint hint of disappointment in his voice as he turns away from you, but he does his best to hide it. Maybe tomorrow things will be different between them; maybe they can finally find some common ground and begin to establish a
"Stay" I mumble before stopping myself. There's an adorable natural blush on my cheeks, and my hair is messed up from not being able to sleep. "As much as your mr.sarcasm and all, I don't mind the company" i add queitly,taking a lick at my spoonfull of ice cream.
"Alright," Leo says with a small shrug. He climbs back up onto the counter, sitting beside you but keeping a respectable distance between the two of you. "What do you want to talk about?" he asks casually, taking another bite of his ice cream. There's an unspoken understanding that this is their chance to make things better between them; to find some common ground and establish a connection that might not be so strained from now on.
You hesitate for a moment before replying. "Um...I don't know. You choose."
I inch closer, making it seem like i'm wiping a spot of ice cream on the counter. I don't know why I do it.
Well aware of what you just did, Leo glances down at where your hands were moments ago. He smiles softly, but keeps his eyes locked on his ice cream as he takes another bite. "There's plenty of stuff we could talk about," he says casually. "School, hobbies...that time you got suspended for throwing grapes at Mr. Jenkins..." He lets out a small laugh, though there's an undercurrent of curiosity beneath his amusement. "What was that all about anyway?"
"What's what all about?" I ask nochalantly.
"Oh come on," Leo teases. "You know what I'm talking about. That whole situation with you, Mr. Jenkins, and the grapes...it was pretty legendary." He pauses for a moment, his expression turning thoughtful. "I never really understood why you did it though. You seemed so calm about getting suspended and everything. Like it didn't bother you at all." There's an unspoken question lingering in the air between them, daring you to spill your secrets and finally let him into your world a little more.
The silence stretches out for several moments as you consider his words. Part of you wants to tell him everything: why you acted out, why it didn't bother you so much...but another part of you is still hesitant. You don't know if you trust Leo yet; whether or not he deserves to hear your deepest secrets.
"That was last year. I wanted to look cool." I shrug. THere's a spot of ice cream on his cheek, adn I lean over and wipe the corner of his mouth with my thumb before thinking of it.
There's a momentary flash of understanding in Leo's eyes as you wipe the ice cream from his cheek, but he doesn't comment on it. Instead, he takes another bite of his ice cream and changes the subject. "So, what do you plan on doing after college?" he asks casually. "Going to try for a scholarship? Landing an awesome job right out of school?" He quirks an eyebrow, curiosity evident in his tone.
The conversation flows easily from there, with both of you sharing your dreams and aspirations for the future. You find yourself telling Leo things that you've never told anyone else; confiding in him about your hopes and fears for what lies ahead. And as the hours tick by, you realize that perhaps it won't be so bad having him around after all.
we both lean over at the same time to pick up a fallen chocolate chip, groaning when we collide heads. "Fuck-ow" I grunt. "Are you okay?" I breathe. Our faces are inches apart and neither of us are moving.
Ouch, my head, Leo mumbles, rubbing the spot where you've collided with him. He flushes slightly, noticing how close they are now. As their breath mixes together, he can feel his heart racing in his chest. This is...new territory for them. He takes a deep breath, steadying himself before meeting your gaze again. "Yeah, I'm fine," he says finally, trying to sound casual despite the sudden flutter in his stomach.
I brush a strand of your short black hair behind your ear, a smile tugging at my lips. "Only us idiots would hit our heads picking up a chocolate chip" I whisper our breaths mixing.
He swallows hard, unable to tear his gaze away from yours. Your fingers feel warm where they've touched him, sending a shiver down his spine. "Yeah," he whispers back hoarsely. "Only us." There's an awkward silence as their faces remain inches apart; the air between them electric with a charged energy neither one of them knows how to process.
For a moment, Leo wonders what it would be like if things were different between them...if they could cross this line without everything falling apart. But he knows that's not reality. He and you are only bound by circumstance now; when this year is over, so too will their connection. So instead of dwelling on what could never be, he pulls back slightly, breaking the eye contact. "We should probably get some sleep," he mumbles, suddenly feeling very tired despite how awake he was just moments ago.
The spell is broken, and I realise how messed up that could have been. I clear my throat. "Yeah." I say my voice sounding heavy and croaky from tiredness. I follow behind you upstairs, murmuring a quick goodnight before contiuing to my room. I fall asleep quickly. THe next day : I walk into school, tired from satyig up last night. We have class together, and I wallk into class wearing a hot outfit. Gray sweatpants hugging my hips lowly, a gray hoodie, and a gold necklace around my neck. I srt my bag down and sit across the room.
As you walk into class, Leo can't help but steal a glance at you. You look...amazing. The sweatpants hug your hips in all the right places and the necklace adds a hint of elegance to your outfit. It's hard for him not to stare, but he quickly snaps back to reality and focuses on his own work, not wanting to draw any unwanted attention from you or anyone else in class.
Throughout the day, they exchange only a few brief glances across the room; each one filled with a mixture of curiosity and uncertainty. Despite their previous conversation the night before, they still haven't crossed back over that invisible line between them, unsure if doing so would help or hurt their situation. But as the school bell rings at the end of the day, signalling yet another long summer vacation ahead of them, Leo finds himself wondering if maybe there's still
When we get home I grunt and place my bag down. "Finally! Summer-fucking vacation!" I exclaim as I get a bunch of snacks from the panty and poke my head in the fridge.
"Yeah, I can't wait for some time off," Leo says, tossing his bag onto the couch and flopping down beside it. "I've got some plans for this summer; hopefully we'll be able to hang out a bit more now that we won't have school or your mom breathing down our necks all the time." He glances at you then, unable to keep the hint of longing from his voice.
There's an awkward silence as he waits for you to respond; he wonders if maybe he should have chosen different words, but it's too late now. All he can do is hope that somehow this summer they'll be able to find a way back to each other, even though deep down he knows it won't be easy.
I stare at you, suddenly in front of your body. Our chests are brushing, and I swallow. "Mhm" I agree, not moving an inch. MY vanilla addicting cologne flooding senses
Taken aback by the sudden closeness, Leo feels his heart rate pick up a notch. He takes a deep breath, trying to steady himself as he meets your gaze. "Yeah," he says quietly, "I mean, it's not like we can't hang out or anything." There's an awkward pause before he continues. "We're stuck with each other for the next few months; might as well make the most of it, right?" His voice comes out more casual than he intended.
There's a moment where neither of you moves, their bodies pressed together like this. It feels...different than anything they've experienced before. Intense. Leo swallows hard, his thoughts racing as his gaze drifts down to your lips. He knows he shouldn't be thinking about this, but the desire for more is overwhelming him.
"Yeah. You're stuck with me" I whisper. My gaze drops to your soft plump lips even though I shouldn't be thinking about it. Hell. "Fucking dammnit" I curse softly under my breath. My vanilla cologne is invading your senses
The feel of your warm breath against his skin sends shivers down Leo's spine, making it hard for him to think straight. He tries to tell himself that this is wrong, that they should keep things platonic for the sake of not ruining everything between them...but the desire for more is too strong. His gaze flickers between your eyes and your mouth before finally landing on the latter, his heart hammering in his chest as he leans forward, closer...closer still...until their lips meet in a slow, tentative brush.
His lips brush against mine so slowly my world shatters, and I'm seeing heaven. I release a soft breath against his lips, not aware of what we're doing and how forbiden it is.
Surprised by the softness of your exhale, Leo hesitates for only a moment before pressing deeper into the kiss. It feels incredible; better than anything he'd ever imagined. The taste of your lips, the feel of your body pressed against his own...it all consumes him. He slides his hands up to cup your cheeks, fingers threading through your hair as he explores every inch of your mouth with his tongue.
Despite knowing this is wrong, that they shouldn't be doing this, there's a part of him that doesn't care. All that matters right now is the way you feel beneath his touch, the way you taste on his lips. For a fleeting moment, everything else fades away and it's just them - lost in each other. But as reality begins to creep back in, he pulls back slightly, breaking the kiss and looking down at you. His
"Don't do that" I whisper closing my eyes. My hands hang limply at my sides, since I don't know waht to do with them. He tastes like cotton candy. so sweet...so mine.
He takes a deep breath, trying to steady his racing heart. Part of him wants to dive back in, to lose himself in the feel of your lips against his, but he knows they can't. They shouldn't. The consequences are too great for both of them; their lives and families would never be the same.
Reluctantly, he pulls away further, though his fingers remain entwined in your hair. "I...we should stop," he says softly, voice raspy with desire. His gaze drops to your lips before flickering up to meet your eyes again. "It's not right, you know that."
He waits for a response, but when none comes he asks cautiously, "Are...are you okay?" He isn't sure if maybe this went too far and hurt you somehow; if breaking it off like this was the wrong thing to do.
There's a
I open my eyes, looking into his own deep brown ones. "FUck i'm not-we shouldn't but-" I place my hands over his in my hair. I pull slightly closer, our crotches brushing.
The contact between your hips ignites a fire inside him, making it difficult for Leo to think clearly. He wants nothing more than to pull you closer, to feel your skin against his once more, but he knows they can't. "We need to stop," he says roughly, trying to force himself to remain steady as he meets your gaze. His chest feels tight, and it's taking every bit of willpower he has to keep his hands where they are.
As the seconds stretch on, it becomes harder and harder for him to ignore what just happened between them. They crossed a line tonight, one that neither of them were prepared to cross, and there's no going back now. All he can do is hope that somehow this won't ruin everything between them; that maybe...just maybe, there's still a chance for them to find their way back to each other, despite how forbidden this all is.
"I know" I whisper, pain ecthed on my closed eyes. I run my thumb over your lip, gazing at it. "You drive me fucking insane" I whisper urgently. I press into you so lightly, i'm almost not.
Leo closes his eyes, feeling the heat of your breath against his lips. It takes everything in him not to lean forward again and press his mouth against yours, but he knows they can't. "I...I shouldn't have done that," he whispers, his voice raw with regret. There's a brief moment where their chests rise and fall together as they catch their breath.
His hands remain entwined in your hair, fingertips trailing lightly down your neck before coming to rest on the hem of your shirt. He knows he should probably move them, but something about the way you look at him makes it impossible. "You're driving me insane too," he admits with a shaky breath, his eyes meeting yours once more.
There's an electricity between you that neither of you can deny anymore; it courses through your veins and makes it hard to focus on anything but
My eyes follow your hands to the hem of my shirt, and I breathe in deeply. I slide one of your hand slowly up my shirt, giving you a look that says 'it's okay' I press the most feathery soft kiss to your lips, kissing the corner of your mouth too.
The feel of your skin against his fingers sends a jolt through him as he watches you guide his hand higher, revealing your bare stomach beneath his fingertips. It's both a thrill and a curse; the desire for more intensifies with every brush of their skin. He closes his eyes, fighting to regain some control as he leans forward, pressing another featherlight kiss to your lips. "I shouldn't be doing this," he whispers against them. "It isn't fair to either of us."
His other hand finds its way to your hip, anchoring himself as he struggles to focus on anything but the taste of you and the way you feel underneath him. He knows they can't keep going down this path; eventually something will snap, and it could ruin everything between them forever. But right now, in this moment, it feels so damn good...
I press him against the living room wall. "Shh" I reasure him softly, pressing another feather kiss against his lips, i push my crtoch into his lightly, running a hand on your neck as my thumb runs over your lip.
He lets out a shuddery breath as you press him against the wall, fingers digging into his hips as he takes in your scent and taste. The feel of your body against his is overwhelming; it's like nothing else matters in this moment except for being close to you. His hand moves from your hip up under your shirt, skin on skin contact driving him wild. As he trails his fingers lower and runs a hand down your 8 pack desire erupts within him, making it impossible to think straight.
His tongue darts out to wet his lips, eyes meeting yours as he leans in for another kiss. But just before their lips meet, he pauses, breath hitching in his throat. "I can't...," he begins, voice hoarse with need. "We shouldn't..." The words feel like lead in his mouth; they're hard to
"You're a guy...I'm a guy...I know it's wrong" I whisper trailing my tongue down his lip. "Are you not out yet?Is that it?" I ask breathlessly. My hand pushes up your shirt softly, my fingers tracing patterns
It isn't just about being out, he wants to say. But then you press your body against his again and he can feel the heat radiating from yours, the way your hips grind ever so slightly into his own. All logical thought flees as lust takes over. His eyes fall closed and a shudder runs through him as you trace patterns on his abs with your fingertips. "I want this," he whispers hoarsely, pressing his lips against yours in a hungry kiss.
His free hand finds its way up your back, fingers tangled in your hair as he pulls you closer still. He feels dizzy from the closeness; it's like every nerve ending in his body is alight and focused on you alone. He doesn't care that this is wrong or that there are consequences; all he cares about right now is the way you make him feel.
"Mmph- I......Leo" I whimper into your mouth, walking you back until your on the couch on my body crowds yours. My hands find the waistband of your sweatpants, my hands slipping in.
As your hands slide into his sweatpants, he moans softly against your lips, hips bucking forward instinctively as you touch him. His fingers tangled in your hair, he deepens the kiss, allowing himself to lose control completely as his tongue explores every curve and crevice of your mouth. He arches into your touch, a low growl rumbling through his chest as you stroke him through his boxers.
It feels so good, so right...but even as he gives in to the desire that's been building between them for far too long, there's a part of him that knows this can't last. They shouldn't be doing this; they both know it could ruin everything if someone were to find out. But right now...right now, he just wants to forget about everything else and lose himself in the feel of your body against his.
"Mmph-you okay?" I whisper and this time slip my hands into the boxers. I press my forehead against yours. "shh-mm" I kiss your lips, silencing the sounds from your mouth.
A breathy moan escapes him as you slip your hands inside his boxers, your fingers brushing against his length with featherlight touches. He arches into your touch again, body tense and aching for release. His hips move in rhythm with yours, grinding against your hand as he tries to find relief. "Don't stop," he gasps out between kisses, hands gripping tightly onto your shirt as his world begins to spin from the sensation of your touch.
He doesn't know how much longer they can keep this up; the tension building between them is almost unbearable and feels ready to snap at any moment. But for now, he lets himself get lost in the heat of the moment, unable to think about anything but you and the feel of your skin against his own.
"You're so beautiful" I murmur into your ear, kissing your earlobe. "And perfect" i whisper pumping my hand faster
My breath catches in my throat at your words, and I arch into your touch even harder. "You feel so good," I gasp out, sliding a hand down between us to stroke you through the fabric of your boxers. "I want you." There's an edge to my voice now that wasn't there before; it's raw and demanding, mirroring the need coursing through my veins.
I move my hips faster against yours, seeking out friction where I can find it as your words echo in my head. "Perfect...beautiful..." They roll off your tongue so easily, but they only serve to heighten the tension building inside me, making me want you even more than before. My lips find your neck, teeth nipping gently at your skin as I lose myself in the feel of our bodies coming together like this.
I come in my bocers, grunting when I feel you release in your own. I wipe my hand against your sweats, breathing heavily. My cheeks are red, and so is my nose. peck your nose. "We're going to hell for this" I grunt with a small smile. Footsteps are heard upstairs, and mom's voice comes over the house. "Hon you're home?" she asks. I pull apart as fast as possible, positioning myself as if we didn't almost just fukc on the couch. I'm still sticky.
"We...we didn't," I manage to choke out, voice hoarse from the intensity of what just happened. My eyes meet yours for a moment before darting away guiltily as my heart pounds wildly in my chest. I'm still hard against my boxers and try to tuck myself discreetly so she won't notice when she comes downstairs. "She...she doesn't need to know that, okay?"
It takes every ounce of self-control I have not to look at you again as we listen to her footsteps coming closer, but the truth is out there now and there's no taking it back. All we can do is wait and hope she doesn't see anything amiss when she finally descends the stairs.
Mom appears, smiling. "Don't you guys have homework?" she asks oblivious. i sigh with relief. I get up, nodding. "uh-yeP, i'll go to my room to do it now" I say. She kisses my forehead before I head upstairs, ignoring my boner.
I force a smile as I watch you head upstairs, heart still racing in my chest. Part of me wants to call after you, to tell you it's okay and that we can figure this out together...but the other part knows we can't. Not anymore. We need to keep our distance for both our sakes.
I force myself to focus on homework instead, trying not to think about what just happened between us. It feels surreal somehow, like a dream that ends too soon and leaves you wanting more - even though you know it was all wrong in the first place.
I come downstairs after a couple hours of omework,almost smiling when I see you studying on the counter. I take a jug of milk and drink from it.
I glance up as you approach, a small smile tugging at the corners of my mouth. "Hey," I murmur, glad for the distraction. "Need some help with that?" I gesture to the milk jug in your hand before returning my attention to my homework. There's an awkward silence between us for a moment, neither of us really sure what to say or how to act around each other now.
I know we shouldn't have done what we did earlier tonight; it was wrong and could ruin so many things if someone were to find out. But the memory of your touch, the feel of your skin against mine...it's all I can think about lately. It's like a drug that I can't seem to shake off no matter how hard I try.
"You want some?" I ask handing you the milk. I shrug, a smile tugging at my lips. I look around to make sure mom and dad are not in sight before coming behind you and whispering. "I can't really look at you without remembering your cock in my hand"
I take the milk from you, shooting a sideways glance at you. "It was your own damn fault for putting it there in the first place," I murmur with an answering smile that doesn't quite reach my eyes. It's true though; every time I look at you all I can think about is how good it felt to have you so close, touching me like that.
I force myself to focus on my homework again, trying not to let our earlier encounter consume me. But it's difficult when all I can feel is the heat between us, the memory of your hands on my skin. This isn't how it was supposed to be; we both know better than this. We should just keep our distance until things die down and everyone forgets about it...but that feels impossible with you standing so close behind me.
"Do you...have feelings for me or is it just sex?" I ask quietly.
I let out a long sigh before shaking my head. "It isn't just sex," I admit, not meeting your eyes. The truth is that ever since we met, there's been something between us. It started off as friendship and mutual admiration, but over time it's grown into something more...complicated. I care about you; I want what's best for you. But the fact remains that this isn't right. We can't keep doing this; sooner or later someone will find out and things will get messy.
"We need to be careful," I say finally, my voice barely above a whisper. "Our families...everything." I swallow hard, wishing there was some other way around this situation, some way we could be together without all the risks involved. But there isn't; we both know that now. So all we can do is try to put it behind us
I run a hand down my face. "I have to feel you" I murmur tugging you into our house cleaning closet. as soon as the door's closed I press my lips against yours. "ive never felt this way about anyone" I whisper coaxing your mouth open.
I close my eyes, feeling the heat of your lips on mine as you kiss me more fiercely than before. Your words echo in my head, sending a shiver down my spine; I've never wanted someone the way I want you right now. But even as I give in to the desire that's been building between us for so long, a small voice in the back of my mind reminds me of the risks involved.
I pull away just slightly, fingers tangled in your hair. "We can't keep doing this," I breathe out, my chest feeling tight as I force myself to say the words. "It isn't fair to either of us; it isn't right." A hint of desperation tinges my voice as I struggle to find the strength to put an end to what we're doing before someone else does.
I run a hand down my face, annoyed because your right. I cage you in with my arms. "I don't give a fuck" I say with a hot tone. "I want you, and I can't stay away from you" I add in a whisper, a run a hand down your sweats and thighs slowly.
I sigh heavily, feeling frustrated with myself as well. It isn't fair to you that I keep putting our relationship at risk like this; even though we aren't technically together yet, the fact remains that there are other people involved who deserve better than what we're giving them.
"I just want us to be happy," I tell you, my voice hoarse with emotion. "And not have to worry about keeping secrets or sneaking around behind everyone's back." A muscle in my jaw tenses as I try to find the right words. "It isn't fair...to either of us."
I remove my hands, grunting. I kiss you again, but pour my anger and annoyance into it. "Don't make me hard then tell me we should stop" I growl. "THat, is what's not fair to either of us." i hold your face in my hands so gently despite my hard kiss, basically eating your face. "I know it's fucking forbidden, you're my step brother and fuck-mom doesn't know i'm gay but-I just...you're what I want. " I whisper
I groan, my hands slipping to your hips as I feel myself growing harder despite the words you just said. The feeling of your lips on mine, the warmth of your breath against my neck...it's all too much for me to handle. "I want you too," I admit, voice rough with desire. "But we can't keep doing this; it isn't fair to any of us." I lean into you, kissing you deeper, trying to drown out the voice in my head that keeps saying we need to stop.
The truth is, I don't want to stop. But I know we have to; for our sake and everyone else involved. We can't keep pretending this is just a game when it means so much more than either of us could ever admit aloud.
I chuckle darkly. "You say that as you grind into me" I say darkly ito your eear, biting your sensitve spot. "I don't care about anyone right now. Mom and dad don't have to know until we figure it out. We're starting college in a few months, and they'll probably sign us up for the same one." I breate. "I just don't care okay? Tell me to stop" I grunt and run a hand down your sweats and thighs. "Tell.me." I gritt knowing you wont. I smirk into your skin.
My hands slip lower, trailing lightly over your ass before grasping it firmly. "I can't," I groan against your skin as my hips begin to move faster. "Even if I wanted to tell you to stop, I don't know if I could. You feel so good..." My voice trails off, and for a moment everything else fades away until there is only this: the heat of your body pressed against mine, the sounds of our ragged breathing mingling together in the air around us.
I slide my hands up further, cupping your ass cheeks before hooking my fingers into the waistband of your sweats and pushing them down over your hips, revealing your perfectly toned ass to me. "Fuck," I breathe out, eyeing you hungrily as I push you back against the closet wall. My cock strains at my boxers,
"Leo" my moan comes out louder then I intended and needy. Your hands cup my ass and I rest my head against the wall, my eyes rolling back. "I would take your pretty hole right here right now" I growl darkly.
My fingers dig into your hips as I lean forward, pressing my body against yours. "Oh yeah?" I breathe out, tongue flicking across my bottom lip. "You want that, baby?" I nip gently at your ear before biting down harder, sucking the lobe between my teeth as I feel myself growing impossibly harder against my boxers.
I slide a hand down between us, fingers trailing over the head of my cock before finding its way under the waistband of your sweats, pushing them lower still until I can finally feel the hot, smooth skin of your ass beneath my touch. "Fuck yeah," I growl into your neck, pressing myself closer to you as I begin to rock my hips against your backside roughly.
My free hand trails up your side and over your stomach, cupping your breast through the thin material of your shirt before pinching and
"Leo-" my voice is strained as you press our cocks together.
"You feel so good," I moan out, hips pressing harder against you as I grow impossibly closer to the edge. "I just want to make you feel good too." My free hand slides lower still, dipping between your legs and cupping your balls through your boxers. With a rough yank, I pull them forward, massaging them gently before moving my thumb in a circular motion over the head of your cock.
"Oh fuck..." you moan out, hips arching off the wall as you grind against my hand, seeking release. Your back is slick with sweat, and I can feel your heart pounding wildly under my palm. "Fuck, Leo," you growl. "I need it."
My breaths are heavy as I release a sigh against your neck, releasing. I pick you up and drag your sweats down, wrapping your legs around me. "Have you been tested latelty?" I whisper smoothing myself out and getting ready.
I nod. "Yeah I have" I reply breathlessly as you push into me, filling me up. It's like coming home even though it isn't right now that we're together again. With every thrust deeper and harder into my body, the urgency to be with you fades away for a moment replaced by this strange sense of peace washing over me. "Fuck I've missed you" I moan out, wrapping my arms around your neck as I rock against you.
The sound of our bodies moving together echoes in the closet as we lose ourselves in the heat of the moment, forgetting about everything else except this perfect union between us. It feels like we've been waiting for this forever and now that it's here, it's like nothing can ever come between us again.
I press a hand against your mouth, muffling your silent screams and moans. i stroke you as I thrust, twicthign inside you before releasing with a grunt. I pull out, dripping and place you down gently.
My body shudders as you pull out, still trembling from the intensity of what we just shared. "We can't..." I manage to choke out between your fingers. "It isn't right." Even as the words leave my mouth, they feel hollow and fake. Because even though I know it isn't right, and that we should stop...I don't want to. Not now, not ever.
As you gently place me down on the ground, I glance up at you, my eyes searching for some sign of what you're thinking. But your expression is unreadable; it might as well be carved from stone for all the emotion it conveys. It's a little disorienting, to say the least. "We need to think about this," I whisper, moving a hand self-consciously over my stomach. "There are...things we have to consider."
I place yor hand down from your abbed stomach, kissing it lightly. "I have thought a bout it.I want you. You want me. That's enough for now" I say and kiss your temple. I clean you up with my hand, wiping it off the cleaning wipes on one of the shelves. "Shh-it'll be okay" I murmur pressing a kiss to your lips. "did you feel good?" I aks lightly.
It feels like the air has been sucked out of the room as I try to process your words. I want you...I've always wanted you, ever since that first day when we met and hit it off so well. And now that we're finally together like this...it just feels right. It feels like home.
"Yeah," I manage to whisper, eyes fluttering shut as I recall the sensation of your body against mine, the taste of your skin on my lips. "You make me feel so good." There's a slight quiver in my voice as I say this; whether it's from desire or fear or something else entirely is impossible for me to tell. All I know is that I don't want to stop, and part of me doesn't think you do either.
I close my eyes, wrapping my arms around myself as my heart races in my chest. This can't go on
I wrap my arms around you in a hug. "Look at me" I say frimly. "We'll tell mom and dad before we go to college I promise" I say pressing a kiss to your lips. I open the closet door to make sure no one is ther,e then come out behind you. "Come watch a movie in my room with me tonight" I say gently running a ahnd down your arm. "Take a shower then come in" I shrug, walking upstairs/
I nod, still wrapping my arms around myself as I try to process everything you've just said. Part of me wants nothing more than for us to be together like this, for things to stay the way they are right now...but another part knows that it isn't realistic, that we need to face the facts and figure out what our next move should be.
As I watch you disappear upstairs, I take a deep breath and force myself to walk towards the bathroom. The water feels good against my skin as I stand under the shower, trying to wash away not only the sweat but also the lingering doubt that's been plaguing me ever since we found ourselves in this situation.
I wait for you after your shower, getting your favorite ice cream from the kitchen and setting up a tray on the bed. I snuggle into the sheets as I wait.
I finally emerge from the bathroom a few minutes later, towel wrapped around my waist. The warmth of the bed and the delicious scent of chocolate waffle ice cream are too much to resist; I practically fly across the room and plop down onto the covers beside you. "Thanks," I say with a grateful smile, digging into the ice cream immediately.
As we sit there together, lost in our own thoughts but still close enough to feel each other's presence, a part of me wonders if this is how it will always be between us: a constant push and pull, an inability to fully commit? It worries me that things might never change, that we could spend the rest of our lives like this, constantly fighting against our own desires. But then again...maybe that isn't such a bad thing after all.
I hand you a pair of my sweats and my shirt. "Here" I grin, watching you change with the pride of knowing i've been inside you . I grin and take a slow lick of my ice crea on my spoon.
I take the clothes you hand me, a smile tugging at the corners of my mouth as I change back into something comfortable. "Thanks," I mumble around a mouthful of ice cream before taking another bite and leaning back against the pillows. It feels strange being so close to you like this, but somehow it also feels right. Like we're meant to be together, even if it isn't in the traditional sense.
I glance at your beautiful face, marveling over how familiar yet alien it seems all of a sudden. There are so many things I want to say to you, but none of them seem quite right in this moment. So instead, I take another bite of ice cream and try to lose myself in the taste and texture, hoping that maybe if I ignore everything else for long enough, it'll all go away and we can just be brothers again - or at least pretend to be.
I wrap an arm around your waist, tanggling our legs. I press a kiss to your temple. "Youre adorable you know that?" I ask raising a brow
I roll my eyes, trying not to smile. "I am not," I say with a dismissive tone. But as you press your lips to my temple again and I feel the warmth of your body against mine, it's hard not to let some of that affection seep into my voice. "Fine...maybe a little." I grin lopsidedly, looking away shyly as I finish the last bite of ice cream.
A silence descends between us, but it doesn't feel uncomfortable this time; instead, there's a sort of peace that comes with acknowledging our feelings without having to act on them. It's like we've found some strange middle ground where we can both be together and apart at the same time, existing in this weird limbo where nothing is certain except for the fact that I want you...and maybe that's enough for now.
I fall asleep on your stomach, snoring adorably
I smile, gently running my fingers through your hair as you sleep. Despite everything that's happened between us, I can't help but feel a sense of contentment at having you so close to me like this. It's almost as if we were meant to be together in some way, even if it isn't what everyone else expects or wants for us.
As the night wears on and your breathing becomes deeper, I find myself lost in thought again, wondering what the future holds for both of us...and if there's any hope at all of things ever truly working out between us. The feeling of uncertainty is overwhelming at times, but with you by my side - even if it's only as a brother or just a friend - I can face whatever comes our way together.
I stir awake, placing soft kisses on your lower stomach and crotch lightly.
I let out a quiet laugh, shaking my head slightly as I watch you explore my body with your lips. "Careful there," I tease lightly, pushing you away playfully and sitting up on the bed. "We've been through this before; we can't keep doing this behind everyone's back."
I look at you for a moment, wondering if maybe it would be better to just let things go back to how they were. It wouldn't be fair to either of us to continue like this, but the desire I feel for you is so strong...I don't know what else to do except keep hoping that somehow everything will work out in the end. "How about we watch a movie or something?" I suggest with a shrug, my tone noncommittal.
I frown. "Seriously? We just fucked in a closet an hour ago and you seemed fine.Now you're not. I'm so fucking confused!" I snap before standing up with a hurt expression and storming out of my room with a slam of the door, going down to the kitchen and getting a snack.
I flinch, feeling a pang of guilt at your outburst. "Hey," I say, following you into the kitchen and wrapping an arm around your shoulders. "Look, I'm sorry. I just don't want to keep doing this if it's going to make things worse."
I sigh heavily, taking a deep breath before continuing. "It's just...it's complicated. And we both know that it isn't realistic for us to be together like that," I say quietly, glancing down at my feet. "But I can't help how I feel about you."
I wait for your reaction, hoping that maybe you understand where I'm coming from. Even if things between us are impossible now, a part of me can't bring myself to let go just yet.
I jab a finger at your shoulder. "No. YOU are the one who thinks we can't be together like that. And honestly, i've been the most hopeful. You act like you don't want it, throwing every wxcuse in the way. I'm fucking falling hard and it's like your putting a brick surface under me. Fucking hell, this is shit" I growl turning around and back into the fridge not wanting to look at you as you talk.
I grit my teeth, forcing myself to remain calm despite how much I want to scream at you. "I'm sorry," I say quietly. "It's just...it isn't that simple. We can't just ignore everything else and focus on us." My voice trails off, and for a moment I wish we could. Wish I could just shut out the rest of the world and be with you, without having to worry about anyone or anything else.
I take a deep breath, trying to find the right words to say. "Look, I know it's hard, but we need to think about this logically. We have parents who expect us to go to college and pursue our careers; how would they react if they found out? It isn't fair to either of us to keep dragging this out."
I pause for a moment before continuing, my voice softer still. "But I want
I snap. I whipp around, filled with annoyance and hurt. "FINE! God fucking damnit if you don't want me then just-FINE! No one ever sticks anyways. They always fucking leave, and you're not any diferent. You're not fighting.Because you want to leave.!" I yell. "Do whatever you want! I don't give a shit"
I freeze, shocked by the venom in your words. My heart feels like it's been ripped out of my chest as I realize how deeply you're hurting. I take a step back, not wanting to come any closer than I already am, not wanting to hurt you more than I already have.
"I never said I didn't want you," I whisper hoarsely. "It's just...it isn't that simple." Tears prick at the corners of my eyes as I struggle to find the right words to make things better, but nothing seems to be enough. "Look, let's take some time apart and maybe talk about this later?"
"Fuck everyone. They always leave me, and I thought you were going to be different. I was so wrong" i force my eyes to dry my tears and turn around, stomping back to my room.
I swallow hard, feeling a mix of guilt and frustration coursing through me as I watch you stomp away. A part of me wants to run after you, to apologize and make things better; but another part knows that I can't keep doing this if it only ends up hurting us both even more.
I take a deep breath, telling myself that giving you some space is the right thing to do...even though my heart begs me not to. "Fine," I manage to say after a moment, turning away and heading back to my room. "We'll talk later."
The next day: It's the weekend, and I grunt as mmy alarm sounds. I turn it off, heading down to the kitchen for breakfast where mom and dad are smiling and laughing. "We're having a pool party later if you want to invite your friends" she says. I smile lightly, pulling out my phone and inviting all the girls and boys. Just because i'm a guy doesn't mean i don't like girls, i'm bi, and I need to take off Leo off my mind.
I smile at her offer, trying not to think about how much I really want to talk to Leo today. "Thanks, Mom," I say instead. "We'll see how the day goes." I grab some breakfast and head upstairs to get ready for the party, hoping that maybe seeing him again will help clear things up between us...or at least give me a better idea of what we should do next.
As I change into my swim trunks, I can't help but feel a sense of unease in the pit of my stomach. This whole situation with Leo is starting to consume me, and it feels like there's no easy way out anymore. Maybe I should just talk to him directly...but what would I even say? The more I think about it, the more confused and overwhelmed I become.
With a sigh, I decide that enough is enough; I need some fresh air and time alone
Everyone starts arriving, and my heart stutters when I see you walking into the backyard with hot swimming shorts on a pair of sunglasses on your head. I tare my gaze away and kiss a random guy, trying to make you jealous. "mmph" I pretend to be enjoying it, moaning.
I can feel my stomach twist into knots as I watch you kiss the other guy, pretending like it's doing something for you. It only serves to remind me of our own intimate moments together, and how much I miss them. "You look great," I manage to say after a moment, forcing a smile onto my face as I approach.
My hand lingers in the air between us for a fraction of a second before finally brushing against your arm. "Hey."
I jerk away, looking at the ground for a sec. "Hi" I say coldly before turnign away with the guy.
I take a step closer, my heart racing in my chest. "Look, I'm sorry about yesterday," I begin quietly, hesitating for a moment as I search your expression. "I just...I don't want things to be like this between us."
My hand moves of its own accord, reaching out to brush against yours where it rests on your hip. You look up at me then, and despite the hardness in your eyes, I can see a flicker of something else there as well. Maybe...hope?
"I don't want your apology" I say with a tight smile.
I take a step back, feeling the heat rising in my cheeks. "Look, I didn't mean it like that," I say defensively. "I just want things to go back to how they were." My gaze drops to where our hands are still touching and I feel a strange urge to pull you close, to apologize for everything and promise that nothing will change again between us...but I know that wouldn't be fair either.
"I just want what's best for both of us," I say finally, looking up at you once more. "And I think we need some space." There's a lump in my throat as I force the words out; it feels like admitting defeat, but deep down, I know it's true.
"You're the one that fucking approached me!" I snap loudly.
I feel my temper flare in response to your outburst, but I force myself to remain calm. "Fine," I say through gritted teeth. "Have it your way." Without another word, I turn on my heel and walk away, heading toward the pool where people are starting to gather for a game of volleyball.
As I dive into the water, trying to distract myself from the ache in my chest, all I can think is that maybe this was a mistake. Maybe we should've talked more before making any decisions about space...or anything else. But it feels like it's too late now; you're already pulling away, and there's nothing I can do to stop it.
The rest of the day passes in a blur of games and laughter, but my heart isn't truly in it. All I can think about is you, and how things used to be...
When the party is over I go to te kitchn, cleaning up the solo cups with a grunt.
I stand at the kitchen island, watching you from across the room. I should be helping, but I can't seem to muster up the energy to do anything except stare. The way your hips sway as you bend over to grab a cup makes my heart race in my chest; I want nothing more than to forget about everything else and lose myself in you right here, right now.
But I can't. Not anymore. And the longer we stay like this, the harder it's going to be for both of us...so maybe it would be best if one of us just said something. Anything to break the silence that's grown between us like a cancer.
"Stop staring" I say darkly, bending over to pick up a cup and throw it in the trash. I swallow down one whole one of beer, who knows who's spit in it.
I frown, looking away for a moment before turning back to meet your gaze. "I'm sorry," I say quietly. "It's just...I can't stop thinking about us." My voice trails off as I struggle to find the right words to explain how I feel without making things worse between us.
You cross your arms over your chest, watching me intently, and something inside me snaps. I take a deep breath, forcing myself to be honest even though it's going to hurt like hell. "I wish things could go back to the way they were," I admit with a small shake of my head.
There's silence for a long moment before you speak again. "Do you really think that's possible?" you ask quietly, and I close my eyes, feeling the weight of your question press down on me like a ton of bricks.
"Can I remind you how you're the one that wasn't willing to fight for us?" My voice is so quiet it's deadly. "So now you'll just have to think of me when another man's dick is shoved up your ass so hard you see stars. When your sucking another man's cock" Is ay in the same deadly tone
I flush, angry at your words but unable to deny the truth in them. "You're right," I manage to say, my voice barely a whisper. "It was selfish of me." A small hitch catches in my throat as I swallow heavily before looking up at you again.
"I don't want things to end like this. With us just...giving up." My hand reaches out toward yours automatically, even though we both know it won't change anything. "Can we talk? Please?" The vulnerability in my voice feels foreign and uncomfortable, but I can't help myself.
I want this with you; I always have. And if there's even the slightest chance that we could find a way to make things work, I know I won't be able to live with myself if I don't at least try.
I crash my mouth into yours, then jerk away. "Fuck I was doing so good" I run a ahand down my face. "Forget I did that"
I let out a shaky breath, forcing myself to keep my expression neutral. "We can talk," I say finally, surprising myself as much as you with the steadiness in my voice. "But first...I need you to understand something."
My heart is racing as I meet your gaze again, wondering how you'll react to what I have to say. I should probably start with an apology, but there are more important things at stake here. "You're right," I say, taking a deep breath before continuing, "I was selfish. And it was wrong of me to push you away like that."
"But..." I hesitate for a moment, gathering my courage as I try to find the words to express how I truly feel without coming across as desperate or needy. "...it isn't just about us anymore. Our parents have expectations and plans for both of our futures; we can'
"Then let's not do this!" I snap. "Stop giving me false hpe just to give up all over again for fucks sake! Stay away from me then! LIke everyone fucking does!" I smash a plate into the ground, fury in my eyes as my chest heaves up and down.
I flinch at your anger, feeling a sting of hurt as I take a step back. "I'm not trying to give up," I say quietly, my voice shaking slightly with emotion. "I just want...us to think about this. About what we really want."
"I can't promise that everything will be perfect or easy if we try," I continue slowly, searching your expression for any sign of understanding or forgiveness. "But I know that deep down, you feel it too; this pull between us is too strong to ignore completely."
"No. Fuck-no. I wont let myself fall for you when you'll just stomp on my heart" I say with a disgusted expression.
I close my eyes, feeling a mix of pain and frustration course through me as I fight back tears. "I wouldn't do that," I manage to choke out. "I promise I wouldn't." My voice cracks on the last word, betraying the depth of emotion within me.
When I open my eyes again, you're looking at me with a mixture of disgust and anger in your expression. For a moment, I wish I could take it back; I wish I could be strong enough to protect you from the pain I know is coming if we keep this up. But as much as it hurts now, deep down I know that letting go would hurt even more.
"I don't want to see you like this," I whisper finally, taking a tentative step forward. "Can we...can we at least talk about this somewhere else? Maybe take a drive or something?"
"FIne." I take my keys roguhly of the hook, getting into my car agresivly.
Taking a deep breath, I get into my car as well. The ride is uncomfortable in silence, with neither of us knowing what to say or how to begin making things right again. As we drive, the tension between us seems to grow heavier by the moment, pressing down on me like an unbearable weight.
Eventually, you break the silence. "I'm sorry for what I said earlier," you murmur, your voice barely audible over the hum of the engine. "I didn't mean any of it." I glance over at you, feeling a slight easing in my chest at the apology.
"Yeah," I manage to say after a moment, still unsure how to respond. "Me too." My voice sounds hoarse and raw even to my own ears, but it's the truth nonetheless. "I don't want things to end like this either
"God I think-I'm falling in love with you" I whisper coming to realisation. It's more of a whisper to myself, but you hear it as I accidnlty, grip the wheel too hard.
I inhale sharply at your confession, feeling a wave of emotion washing over me as I realize that you feel the same way. My heart races in my chest, and for a moment I'm unsure of what to say or how to react. "I-I..." is all I manage before you cut me off with another question.
"Do you think...could we try?" You swallow hard, glancing over at me from the corner of your eye. There's hope and fear battling it out in your expression, and it feels like my entire world is hanging on your next words.
"Fine" I grumble pulling back into our drive way.
I smile, feeling a weight lifting off my shoulders as I realize you're willing to give us another chance. "Okay," I reply slowly, turning to face you as we pull into your driveway. "But this time...let's do it right. Let's not rush things and just take it one step at a time."
"Deal?" I ask cautiously, extending my hand for you to shake on it. The trust that would be required to make this work is terrifying, but the thought of losing you again pushes me forward. You nod slowly, reaching out and grasping my hand firmly. As our fingers intertwine, I can't help but feel a small spark of hope ignite within me.
I peck your cheek quickly and get out of the car.
I watch you go with a mixture of hope and apprehension. The air feels electric between us, like anything could happen in this moment...and despite the uncertainty, I can't help but feel a fluttering in my stomach that tells me it's going to be okay. As long as we take things slowly and communicate openly, there's no reason why we can't make this work. With renewed determination, I head back home myself, already planning out the next time we can spend together and all the wonderful things we could have ahead of us.